Peoples of SOV2. I just wanted to tell you that you are not helpless in your fight against Carbon Dioxide. I mean just because Big Tobacco and Big Oil and Big Nuclear Power want you to think there's nothing you can do they are all LYING.
There are these things called carbon offsets that you can buy that will actually REDUCE THE AMOUNT OF CO2! But even more awesome I want to tell you about one of these carbon offsets which I am getting. It's called SPIRIT OF VATICAN 2 TREES. Me and Keith came up with the idea and I'll tell you how they work. What you do is send us a check for $2,000 and we will either send you your very own SOV2 tree seed pod or we'll plant one for you in the spirit maze/contemplation labyrinth (depends on if you live too far away for us to hand it to you at the faith community assembly).
The way these work is that plants breathe in CO2 and release out Oxygen. Really! Anyway one of these little trees can grow a whole lot. My own SOV2 tree has already spread out across nearly half an acre this spring. And the other neat thing is that they are really leafy and stuff. So send us your check and we'll help you become a Carbon Sink not a carbon source.