Thursday, October 18, 2007

A Plea to the University of Dayton

Dear Friends,

A colleague of mine at the University of Dayton has allerted me to a plan to renovate the chapel. I know many of you are right now saying... well... what has this to do with me? Dear friends it has everything to do with you.

The chapel which was a gaudy throwback to middle ages narrow mindedness was incompletely renovated in the 1970's when the Spirit of Vatican 2 dictated that all the statues should be removed, the pews and the altar rail ripped out, the marble altar, the frescoes on the wall obliterated, the stations of the cross and other icons of the Roman Fascist Church should be confined to the junk heap of history where they belonged.

Only a few horrendous monstrosities like an "ornately carved" pulpit, a gaudy organ in a choir gallery were allowed to serve as reminders of a dreadful "baroque" age of catholic backwardness. Truely, you could virtually envision Torquemada in that pulpit ordering the slow torture and murder of helpless Jews and Moors. You could virtually hear John Paul II ordering the imprisonment of Progressive Theologians through the pipes of that organ.

Oh! Should we not have ripped those things out too?! Foolish were we back then in our lack of zeal! How we let the corruption persist! Why did we let one brick stand upon another? Like a weed masculo-Cathlofascism returns!

Oh! University of Dayton, like a mother hen gathering her chicks I would have gathered you up in my wings and nursed you until you were fully able to be the agi-poles I had intended you to be!

Truthfully I do not know what plans they have laid for the renovation but I doubt they could be good. You should see the abstract stained glass windows! Will they be permitted to be retained? You should see the metal and plastic chairs and the green carpet? Shall they be preserved? You should see the plain and simple altar, so light, so fragile, will it be replaced by something lighter and more temporal still?

O! Liberal Theologians of Dayton! Arise! Arise! I beg of you! Do not let the traditionalists break your will! You O Ship of Dreams! O Dreamer Nation of the Goddess-Spirit! O lover of the Divine Feminine! O creature of the Ethno-Catholic apostate! Worshipper of the Democratic Kennedy-Spirit! O Dayton! Dayton! Do not abandon your way! Do not forsake your Idols! Dayton! Dayton!

H. Robert

6 comments:

Miguel Cuthbert said...

Can a mother hen actually nurse her chicks? I kind of thought only mammals could do that.

ignorant redneck said...

I tink ur nuts.

Sr. fairah shuld put you inna box.

mi ma said tinks lik u was e-ville

Anonymous said...

For the love of Gaia! I ran into a papparazzo who snapped a photo of Sister Fairah as she now looks, with her hair gone (revealing her odd-shaped head). She is also wearing a more modest habit now, though she needs to get a veil.

Not sure this is going to work. First I'll try to make a link. If that doesn't work, just use the address below it.

Click here.

http://blufiles.storage.live.com/y1p6lm_ASQuRDqeDQ7VAnfWiVKgjAB31p8fiVzI-

Anonymous said...

Let's try that again (both ways). My address got truncated.

Click here.

Or use this:
http://blufiles.storage.live.com/y1p6lm_ASQuRDqeDQ7VAnfWiVKgjAB31p8fiVzI-RXzox3O2vnGGV6QNMiQpxTSIxV0GM_8F1Cbp4Q

Adrienne said...

Sorry to hear Father Tim has been injured. I did notice he was lurking around my new blog which is just limping along due to my being so stupid. I've dealt with it the only way I know how - ignoring it for the past 4 months. Eeeeerk!! You guys are soooooo smart.

Anonymous said...

That Pic is just so accurate! But I'd rather have a shot that still features my very non-middle-agish figure.