Monday, July 9, 2007

Meet a Wiccan

Hey guys! I just wanted to let everybody to know about an exciting opportunity.

You've not heard from me much lately because I've been hanging out with this gal Krystal. You know at first I was thinking she's kind of gross because she doesn't shave her legs and stuff and she's not really into hygeine. But you know, that's all kind of cool because she's really into the earth. Anyway after the picnic she went chasing after that Sir Crusader but couldn't find him and so she stayed at my place and anyway she took me to meet some of her friends. One of them is named Jade and she is hot! Not like Britnee but kind of because she looks more like Jennifer Anniston except her hair is really dark and curly.

So I was like "you should come hang out at SOV2" and they said "no, because that's a Catholic church and we're into wicca." Maybe you remember Krystal's Tarot card and palm reading booth at the picnic? And I said well we're ecumenical so it would be okay.

Anyway, she said okay and she said maybe it would be cool if she could talk to the SOV2 people about some of the neat wiccan things she does and maybe have a demonstration. Because guess what! They have liturgical dancing too only they call it something different and I can't remember what. So she'll be here this Wednesday to do some of her wiccan things and then she will teach people how to cast a spell. This spell is about how to bring success into your life. And then she'll teach one on how to curse someone you don't like. I thought maybe we could lay a curse on H. Robert or something (LOL). Anyway, she'll be with me at the EcoChurch meeting on Thursday same time and same place as usual.

Oh Yah! Make sure you bring a candle, matches, some string and a needle, a large coin, some velvet cloth, a stone about the size of you little finger, and a picture or some other piece of clothing or hair of the person you want to curse... and some "goats blood" and a little paint brush. If you can't get goat's blood she'll bring some extra. (Oh and make sure you only prick the goat a little, don't hurt it because that's bad!)



radtradchad said...

Was she the one I knocked over her booth screaming "BURN FOUL WENCH!" while asperging her with my concealed holy water bottles?

Seemed like a nice girl. Too bad about the demon possession thing.

-Fr. Chadwick LeJanvier, SSLI

Che' Lovell said...

Hey Fr Chad!

Yah that was her! She is really nice too, but kind of smells a bit. Anyway, she thought that was really funny because she's really into renaissance fairs and stuff like I said before. She also wears all this hemp stuff and things made from natural fibers except when she's casting spells and then she has this wool dress and flax shawl.

If you see that Crusader guy tell her that Krystal really wants to take him out to dinner. Her name is Krystal Morgana and I lost her number but its 1-900- something.


Anonymous said...

So that's why you didn't get in touch to hang out after the picnic! If you hadn't written this, I would've thought you were taking care of everything at the hospital. I'm hurt. I still haven't gotten to tell you about the oppression of the aboriginals! Or gotten to see the new rectory!

-a huffy Taheetee

Rob said...


I feel bad now so I am confessing. I was the one who teepeed your treehouse while you were at the picnic. My traditionalist confessor said that I should admit my sinful deed to you (after wearing the barbed wire around my loins for a few days.)

Anyway, I'm sorry.

uth-tray is-ay I-ay am-ay ot-nay orry-say

RobK said...

Excellent! We we thinking about scheduling a witch hunt. We'll just use the SOV2 Spirit Maze, or whatever it's called.

Sir Rev. Leonard Feeney, HKTTC said...

I think I actually saw Krystal at the picnic. She ran up to me, called me a 'bad boy' and then started to kiss and caress mine armor. She was the one offering the "How to cast a spell to ensure your lesbian lover stays faithful", right?

Verily, the sight of her face reinforced my desire to remain continent for life. And I've seen less body hair on the chests of Spartans!

Sir Rev. Leonard Feeney, HKTTC

Anonymous said...

Hey... isn't Fr. Time and Maryann's talk on supremecy of Conscience that same time? we can't double book like that ... how can I decide what to attend???

Che' Lovell said...

Hey Taheetee! She was just staying with me until she could find a place of her own since her friend Jade went straight and got a boyfriend who was using their place.

I swear! She isn't really big on guys like me because I'm too modern for her and stuff. And besides you know I'm not really into that kind of girl or anything but it was cool about the spells.