Friday, November 30, 2007

Detestable Pig Dogs!


Hello to you and peace be upon you. This is my first comment in many days. It is with great wrath that I now post, for I have found that the parking lot of this place of Christian gathering has been unjustly and unlawfully seized by the heathen natives who defile what is properly the land of the displaced peoples of Palestine. I scorn these new invaders. They will be driven into the sea and the gutters will seethe red with the blood of their livers. We will not rest until their children's children's children are slain by the grandsons of our grandsons and the parking lot becomes once more a home to the serene and peaceful Palestinians who are its rightful denizens. the earth does not belong to us! It belongs to Allah!

Winter Solstice Gift Giving

To celebrate the upcoming Winter Solstice gift giving season I was talking with Dr. Al-fakkir asking what he would like. He has requested quite a few of the following from Amazondotcom

http://www.amazon.com/Uranium-Ore/dp/B000796XXM


So come on people and let's help our syblyng with the true spyryt of the Solstice.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Funny Conspiracy Theory...

Che told me this great conspiracy theory today that he heard in an environmental meeting that he had on one of their island stops. (I hope you didn't really believe it, Che--I kinda saw you look a little upset when I laughed, but I thought that maybe is was because you hadn't gotten to the punchline yet). Apparently some people believe that the US is purposely melting the icecaps with global warming so that they can track Santa more easily.

Back in Knoxville

Hey!

I'm back in Knoxville again. It has been a really exciting trip! We didn't get to spend much time on the beach or anything but we got to meet a lot of people like I wanted. For example, while we were being detained in Miami I got to meet a lot of people trying to flee the American Health Care system by escaping to Cuba. I feel really sorry for them because basically there only chance was to make a boat out of stuff like cardboard and jump in the water off the coast of Florida and hope the wind blew them to Havana. But a lot of them are picked up by the coast guard and sent back to the United States. I wish I could speak Spanish and I am going to get one of those tapes you listen to in the car so I can really empathize with them more. I know they would be really interested to know about people like Che Guevara and Fidel Castro and all the wonderful things they did for the Cuban people and Hugo Chavez who is a real freedom fighter.

Anyway I'll try and be around SOV2 a little more this week. I have some really important shopping to do for the "Feast of the Undying Sun" which is coming up on December 25th. And I have a big surprise which a lot of people are going to be really excited about.

See Ya!
Che'

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Hooray For Us!

Hey!  we've just surpassed 20,000 "hits" on this 'blog (in your face, Curt Jester!)

Anyway, as is our custom here, I am declaring a plenary indulgence for all SOViers to celebrate this momentous event. Hooray!

Let's put this in perspective! 20,000 is:
  • The number of people who voted for Ralph Nader for president
  • The number of Carbon Offset Tons purchased by the entire Gore family (per month)
  • The number of millimeters covered by Ed Begley's car after a 14 hour charge
  • The number of Marty Haugen's sons in the latest Breaking Bread
  • The number of womyn per second who are silenced by the Vatican
  • The number of Rights in the UN Declaration of Human Rights (my favorite is the Right to Quality Cheese)
  • Carl Sagan's SAT score
  • The number of Natyve Amerycans inhabiting our parking lot
Isn't that cool!  Hooray for us!  20,000 "hits"!

Monday, November 26, 2007

More radtradyism found on the internetweb

More sites have been reported by loyal vigilantes of the Spirit. Please note the following additions to the Listo:

Exultet: C, NLU, POD, T
The Happy Catholic: IT, NLU,POD
A Plumbline in the Wind: C, NLU, POD
Video meliora, proboque; Deteriora sequor: F, CF, IT, R


Agent Smith can't the government do something about all of this radtradyism on the net. I'm sure it makes the government look bad especially to our syblyngs in the Middle East and Europe. Not only have the sites above been found, but I found the following graphic below that was just on an internetwebpage out in the open where anyone could see it. Think of the children. Aren't we trying to fight rampant consumption during this time of the winter solstice? And it's obvious that's what this graphic is celebrating...



And in response to live up to my personal motto of batali fajron per fajro I present the following graphic. Remember to keep up the good struggle.

Confused

Hey!

Well, we are back in America again and I can't say I am all that thrilled. This is what happened. Apparently Nate managed to take control of the yacht and sailed it back into Miami last night so when we woke up there were all these people who look like Agent Smith on board. I men they were pretty poilte and everything but they took me into this room and starting asking me questions about my dad and how he made all his money and stuff. I must have been able to answer all there questions and stuff and when I started talking about Fidel Castro, Harry Bellafonte, L. Ron Hubbard and Tom Cruise I think they realized who they were dealing with and stuff and so this other guy walked in and said that I was part of special secret project Adam's Apple which was something Agent Smith said to me one time. It also has something to with this tattoo I got of Hugo Chavez's mom on my arm.

Anyway, I think most of these guys are part of the establishment and are all trained to opress peoples but most of them are nice and listen a lot when I tell them about all the people I meet and what they say and so I think I am really starting to get to them. The werid thing was they wanted to know also about the alien spacecraft that we saw and then they told me not to talk about it. I mean, this is my second time I have been in contact with alien life forces and stuff and they never say anything all that interesting. I mean one time they were all like saying things about Quantum Flux Propulsion and handing me all these diagrams for Fusion Reactors. If anybody wants one of those by the way, I still have them in the back of the Eurovan at Keith's mom's house. Well this time it was different aliens and they were revealing to me the secret of Status Omega which is of course Colonel Xebu's plan to slowly modify the earth's atmosphere so he can introduce Jupiterian life forms. Anyway I am not supposed to tell anybody this except that Dick Cheney is behind it all.

Well that wasn't why I was question this time because apparently the Erpenblechs were like opressing people only the people they were opressing were mostly republicans and stuff like themselves which doesn't make any sense. So I have mixed feelings. I mean if they had defrauded all these peoples and given the money to buy Carbon Offsets I would be like "Yah! Way to go Erpenblechs!" But really they were just buying all this real estate in the Carribean to create a resort for other really rich republican peoples.

Anyway, I better get going as Kerri needs a place to stay. I can't wait until I show Kerri SOV2. She is going to freak out.

Che'

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Homily, Sunday, November 25

Hey! Well, I sure do love feast days. Thursday was super! We finally got the rectory cleaned up from Ché's party - just in time for the big Feast of the Oppression of Native Americans. We had a super time. Clyde was still there after doing the clean up so we let him stay for dinner. A big group of my friends from Maryknoll came down with a passel of Glenmary folks and some Marianists. It was a real "throw-down!" Then at the end of the evening, guess who showed up? That's right, my good friend Fr. Curt Kane. He wasn't able to stay long, but he was the life of the party while he was there.

Anyway, did you know that today is another feast day? Who out there can tell me what feast day it is? No... no that's not it.... no.... no... good guess, though!

OK - it's the Feast of the New Oregon Catholic Press Missalettes! That's right! After this service, the youth group will be replacing the 2007 Breaking Bread with the 2008 Breaking Bread. This is the summit of the liturgical year - the day when we get new misalettes. I've been told that the '08 OCP BB has 30% less traddie music in it, as well as a new mass setting for Clown Masses. I'm a little disappointed that the '08 BB doesn't have the Mime Mass, but there are several great new hymns, including 
  • "The Rainbow Connection," 
  • "If You're Happy & You Know It," 
  • "Wind Beneath My Wings," and finally 
  • "Someone Left the Cake Out in the Rain"

I know you're all as excited as I am! Happy Feast Day!

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Moving againg

Hey!

Well all sorts of weird things keep happening. The green fog finally lifted and according to the compass we are at the north pole now and you would not believe how bad global warming is. I mean it is 78 degrees and sunny and there are dolphins. I told Kerri that this proved that Al Gore was right and she was like "no, Che' the compass is wrong because if we were at the North Pole it wouldn't be sunny because it's winter there!" I think she is a denier or something because deniers say things which make sense but there actually lies and stuff because they aren't real scientists but just angry people with agendas. But she is really funny and nice and stuff so I think I am going to keep being church to her.

Anyway, I was wondering if the Atlantic Ocean now reaches Knoxville.

See Ya!

Che'

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Update

Today is going to be great! All Federal agencies give the day off, so I can enjoy my meal and beer today. I was going to have a small quiet meal today, but when I got home last night I got a telephone call from Fr. Chad at the SSLI inviting me over for their Thanksgiving meal. Apparently, they have a new housekeeper/cook at their rectory who just immigrated to Knoxville from France (she belonged to a group called the SS-PX--for some reason the Traditional groups like to have names that can be abbreviated with letters), and he wanted to show me the improvements they have made to their rectory and the progress on their new Church.

To the Syblings and the DLA: I didn't do anything to those turkeys or communicate with the farmers. I think that turkeys do that by instinct--it is a way to show that they care about a person, by attacking them.

Che: don't worry about the green light and the instrument fluctuations. This is perfectly normal for the area. I knew an Air Force pilot who said that he knew exactly when to fly into the Bermuda Triangle to be able to see the other dimension when it appears.
You should listen to Nate, he knows what he is talking about (I met him the last time there was a conference from all the agencies)

Agent Smith

P.S. Guido McElhone--I cannot get in touch with the Erpenblechs, unfortunately they are now well out of US waters and so out of my jurisdiction.

Feast of the Opression of Native Americans


Hey. Well, I hope you are all really proud of yourselves today. This is the day we "celebrate" how you stole all of the land from the native Americans and ate all of their turkeys, after they taught you how to grow corn by putting it in a fish. We are all on Indian Land. Think you can trust the government? Ask an indian! We belong to the earth, it doesn't belong to us. Free Leonard Piekoff!

Global Warming

Hey!

Just to let everybody know that I'm okay. But there's this green fog everywhere around the yacht. Our motor has gone dead and there is like no wind and the water is all glowing and stuff and the compass doesn't work. I mean, I'm pretty lucky I can still blog!

Anyway, the Erpenblechs are really freaking out because they are really paranoid and are convinced that Nate who is my dad's golf buddy's contractor is really an FBI agent and they have been yelling at him a lot. I mean, I don't know why they are complaining because I pretty much tell Agent Smith evberything I know all the time because a lot of people I know are people he wants to send Christmas cards too and is just trying to stay in touch with.

Anyway, I've been telling Kerri that the green glow all around us is almost surely the Earth telling us we have been bad stewards and stuff and that we need to sacrifice something to Gaia to appease her destructive force or maybe buy carbon credits or something but my dad says that's stupid and that this kind of weather just happens in this region sometimes except the GPS is telling us we're in the Indian Ocean and not in the Atlantic.

I think we may also have accidentally gone through a WORM HOLE and are probably on Jupiter or something.

The cool thing is Kerri and I get to hang out a lot and play Gin Rummy which she is really good at. I think sometimes she let's me win.

Also, we are on page 5,234,211 of the Fountain Head. She was right it has made everything a lot clearer for me. I now realize that I'm like Howard Roark and everybody else is like the really stupid architects. It has to do with the Body Thetan thing. I was hoping the book was over so she could read my play the Bananas of Revenge which she promised she would do right after this book. I mean, I got the point and the book is still going and going. I think the characters talk way too much. When I write my book I won't have any dialog at all. It will all be monolog to make it more exciting.

Oh YAH! Can we have a astatue of a naked womyn representing the Divine Feminine Womyn Spirit? I know someone who can be the model. I think if your a womyn and you look like the Spirit of the Divine Womyn Feminine thing you shouldn't have to work as long as you are willing to model. Only I don't want one of those abstract things I want one that really looks like a womyn.

See Ya!
Che'

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Great changes!

Hello all,

Yes, as "Syblyng" Bob noted, I have been away. I made a pilgrimage to Carthage, TN. I had to do so in order to petition St. Albert to release me from my vows. He graciously consented; and so I've left the Gorebertine Community.

I am now a WomanDeacon, the first step in becoming a WomanPriest. I and my systers are working from within to bring the Church out of the Dark Ages of misogyny, patriarchy, hierarchy, and eco-oligarchy. We will prevail!

In keeping with this, I have taken a new name. I will be known to Gaia-Mother as WomanDeacon Margaret Featherdancer. Margaret, of course, for Gynosaint Margaret Sanger; and Featherdancer as a gesture of solidarity with my indigenous systers.

Let the new day dawn, ending the night of Y-chromosome oppression!

New Banners from OCP


Hey! Well, the new banners are in from the Oregon Catholic Press. I knew there was going to be a Thanksgiving theme, but I'm blown away by how great these Liturgical Banners are. Aren't they great! And they look really professional. Best of all, we get a 25% discount on the banners because we agreed to send our ushers to the OCP's Usher Certification Program. I can't wait to get these hung up in the worship space.

Turkeydeath Day Horror

The first annual Operation Turkey Freedom has been suspended. It is a small and grizzled group here with me after our first strike. We have learned much over the past 24 hours. Did you know that most turkeys are killed and shipped off to the merchants of death long before the actual Turkeydeath Day? As we swept onto our target there were not as many turkeysyblyngs on the "farm" that we would have expected. But then we had our biggest shock yet as the group that was there charged us and began scratching and pecking at us as we tried to gather them towards freedom. It was only later that I was able to understand what had been done. Obviously Agent Smith tipped off the Reagan-Ratzingerist Cabal to our plans to liberate the oppressed turkeysyblyngs. They then spent the time before hand hypnotizing and brainwashing our fine feathered fryends and teaching them to attack the vanguard of the ecosyblyngs. The depths of the perversity of the RRC and the misogynistic federales. What evil minds would train these noble beyngs in the ways of Turkey Fu or Poultry-jitsu? So we have managed to regroup and are scratched, torn and battered. Still the DLA will carry on the fight against the humyn oppressors. Although probably without myself as I am obviously needed back at SOV2....

So a Happy Turkeydeath Day to the reactionary latinist radtradys and such. But syblyngs of good will be assured that we will prevail.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

About the Erpenblechs...

Che,

I have a feeling that there is something wrong here. The company that Mr. Erpenblech owns has been reporting major losses in the past year, yet Mr. Erpenblech seems to have even more money in his personal accout than he had before. Also the numbers painted on their yatch do not seem to have been validly registered. Be careful!

Agent Smith

Operacio Meleagro Libereco

If anyone is looking for me today I will be out with the syblyngs of the Druidical Liberation Army on their annual Operation Turkey Freedom. We are going to liberate millions of turkeysyblyngs who are being held for execution on Turkeydeath Day on Thursday. I'm not sure where Syb Madison is at the moment. She's been very busy on her own project since coming back from St. Louis. So if anyone needs any ecospyrytual guidance Syb Joe will be available. I believe he said he would by in the maze for most of the day.

Sunday, November 18, 2007

My research is going pretty well.

Hey! It's me Che' from the yacht. One of my dad's golf buddies contractor guy who came with us helped me get the sattelite thing working so I could keep in touch. The weather is AWESOME and Kerri and I have been fishing which I know is really cruel and stuff so I basically take the hook of my line. But Kerri caught this really big fish which was pretty neat because she was really excited. Also, we parked the yacht and swam which was fun.


The yacht is big enough that I don't see Mr. and Mrs. Erpenblech at all which is good, but Brenda keeps hanging around Me and Kerri way too much because she is obviously drunk and stuff and it makes it less fun for us, because I can tell that Kerri doesn't like Brenda either because she calls her a lush. I'm not sure what that means but I think it means someone who drinks too much. Kerri doesn't drink. My dad likes to steer the yacht and talk with the Erpenblechs and he pretty much leaves Kerri and me alone.

I can't wait until we get to Bermuda so I can study the endogenous peoples and there socioeconomic political systems. I've been reading the communist manifesto again which is really funny. Kerri wants me to read this book called The Fountain Head, but its like six thousand pages or something. But she said that she would read it to me as we camp out under the stars on the deck.

See ya!

Che'

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Listo Malpermisitaro Update

Thanks to eagle eyed readers of our internetweb pages we have found yet more of those radtrady sites and they have been added to the Listo:

Dymphna's Well: F,O,POD,T
Kansas City Catholic: CF,F,IT,O,T
V for Victory!: BS,CF,EM,IT,R,UM

Al Gore preserve us. Can't he do something about these sites?? But it does look as if one of our more industrious syblyngs managed to sneak a bit into the Kansas City Catholic site giving some "pick up lines" for those at the parish looking for a partner. I'm sure they will work for same sex, group, etc. as well as for hetero if you must. (Although #10 may need some editing):

1. When I first saw you, I knew my centering prayer had been answered.
2. Shades of Jimi! That was the best guitar solo I have ever heard at mass. Who knew “One Bread, One Body,” could R-O-C-K!
3. I loved your guest homily, especially the part about your kids from your first marriage.
4. I promise not to be patriarchal, if you promise not to be submissive, which, from
the looks of things, won’t be hard for either of us.
5. Your interpretive dance after you read the Gospel was really something. I can’t believe you weren’t too exhausted to also distribute communion for Father.
6. I see from the bulletin that you made today’s communion bread. No matter what Rome says, I think the cinnamon and flax seed are always a nice touch, as long as they're organic and fair trade certified.
7. Care to get lost with me in the parish’s prayer maze at the upcoming picnic for those of us that are planning on protesting at the School of the Americas?
8. Imagine. In the future, if we decided to live by Humanae Vitae for a day and then decided that we really could bring a kid into this oppressive Church that we don’t believe in but refuse to leave, then we could name him or her Che.
9. Anybody ever tell you that you look like a young Hans Kung–I mean with a beard and dreadlocks?
10. Please tell me that you don’t put the L in LGBTQ, not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Final Good Bye

This is my final post to all the wonderful folks at SOV2. I have been accepted formally as a member of the Institute of Servants of the Queen of Apostles. I requested what is called a "bilateral transfer" and it was granted. I now assume all the privileges of my new community. They are a wonderful group, and I know I have finally found my lasting home. After more than 40 years of roaming, always wondering where I belong, I have finally found it!

One of the privileges of my new community is that I received a new name. I am no longer Sr. Fairah. I am now Sr. Mary Martin of the Blessed Sacrament. Now before everyone goes on and on, yelling about male domination, let me explain why I LOVE my new name.

Mary: She was the BEST and BOLDEST woman to ever live on the face of the earth. Who else could have told the Son of God to take out the trash?

Martin (de Porres): He is the patron saint of social justice. Now, you know I GET social justice. While my new community doesn't usually DO a lot in the area of social justice, they are really BIG on praying for it. I am dedicating my entire life for the cause of justice in the world. Everything I do will be given over to that end.

"of the Blessed Sacrament": It is tradition that a devotion of particular interest be given to the Sister. Because I have spent close to 20 hours a day in chapel since my arrival in Columbus, they thought it was fitting I be devoted to the Blessed Sacrament, and I agree!

Now, I know some are still screaming about my taking a man's name. CALM DOWN! GET A GRIP! Here's how I see it: We believe that in Christ, there is neither free nor slave, neither male nor male, neither rich nor poor. So if Dym Tim were to decide to become Dym Tammy, you would all applaud his recognition of the divine feminine in him. So, I am doing the same thing. Consider this: taking a male name reminds us all that gender is secondary to being. I am SISTER to all, and that is my primary name. Martin was a HUGE lover of the poor, the natives, the untrodden. I am HONORED to be named after him. Scream all you want, I don't care if it is a male name. It does not bother me at all!

So I will miss everyone. I am happy the Gorbortines are making themselves such a big part of SOV2. I am glad Dym Tim (or Dym Tammy, as some would have it) is back. I hope Che' doesn't come back from his cruise all red like a lobster! I will greatly miss Maryann and Keith and IR. I still call some more women to come forth in leadership at SOV2. I hope Adoro will come around more often ... she has a lot she can teach you all! Oh, and I don't miss H. Roberts at all ... I am praying for the repose of his soul (a concept most of you don't get, but it's ok... God gets it!).

To one and all, peace and the love of Jesus Christ. You will be in my prayers as I give myself over to Jesus. Pray for me, too.

Craziness!

A few days ago, I was asked by Miss Perile to investigate the disappearances of Miss Rosie and Miss Hill. I followed up and found where they are being held by a rogue agency. Now I come back with the papers drafted for their release and I find Miss Perile and Miss Moonsword picketing outside the jail. They are carrying signs telling that other agency to keep the ladies in custody--and protesting some "France-is-canned" group. I don't understand this--but have it your way--they will remain in the custody of that other agency.

Agent Smith

Friday, November 16, 2007

Canticle of the Earthfriends


Hey! Todd has written a special hymn to welcome the gorebertine community to SOV2. You'll be hearing the hymn on Sunday, when we'll be using it for the entrance, offering, communion, and exiting parts of the service, but here's a sneak peek at the lyrics:

CANTICLE OF THE EARTHFRIENDS
Todd Turk, Good Intentions Publications, Copyright 2007

[Verse 1]
Sun, sun, look: there's the sun!
what a joyous and sp'r'ted afternoon
See the sun, hear the rushing wind
we are one with sun and star and moon

[Chorus]
Sun, moon, moon and sun again
flowers, bees, and trees and dancing fawns
Dance, sing, dance a dance of song
Leaping, laughing gaily on the lawns

[Verse 2]
Here comes the Spirit dressed as a tree
what a joyous and sp'r'ted ev-en-ing
Join your hands, join us joyfully
joyfully your joy will make you sing!

[Chorus]

[Verse 3]
Moon, moon! Look, there's the moon!
what a joyous and sp'r'ted mo-orning
As you butter up your bread and look ahead
You'll see the Spirit fast aborning

[Chorus]

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Leaving tomorrow

Hey,

Well I am on my way to Miami tomorrow with my dad and Brenda and the Erpenblechs. We had dinner tonight at Chesapeake's. I was really pretty mad because basically its like one of those slaughter house places because of all the animals they kill and eat in there. Plus, they don't have a really good vegetable selection or anything. But Kerri, this girl I am kind of dating was with us and she said to eat the sea scallops which are like sea cucumbers or something and are plants. I didn't know that so at least there was something I could eat and they were really good. I couldn't eat the "Wedge of Lettuce" because it had bacon bits and that's just wrong in so many ways. I was going to protest right there and lie down of the floor and make people step on me if they wanted to go to the bathroom in solidarity with pigs but Kerri told me that the owner of the restuarant had voted for Al Gore probably so I didn't. Can someone check that out?

My dad is being okay because he said that he would bring a lot of vegetables and tofu and things on the yacht for me to eat, but I am going to miss fallafel and organic beer. When I am with my mom I always get plenty of stuff to eat but a lot of it is gross and like seaweed and things.

I am still pretty upset over H. Robert like a lot of you know. I mean, I am glad that at least it straightened me out because I was all like "Yo! Let's Party" and now I'm back to "Hey! Let's be church!" But just not as spirit-filled maybe. That's why I like Kerri because she is really funny even though her parents are rich republicans. And she is also down to earth and just fun to hang around with and stuff. And she doesn't wear too much make-up. I think a lot of you people who are womyn would really like her a lot, except she is cute and for some reason a lot of you (not all of you) don't seem to like womyn who are cute, except in hollywood. I think she has been repressed a lot and needs to stand up for womyn more because she is always making fun of the PETA girls I think. But since she is a womyn I think it's probably okay for her to do it.

Oh yah! If you see Enrico or Carter at SOV2 make sure you are nice to them.

Che'

Ongoing Investigation

I was at the restricted area at the Knox County Jail yesterday (where the federal agencies keep their arrestees), and there was one cell that I couldn't enter with my thumbprint. I'm pretty sure that it is where Miss Hill and Miss Rosie are being held. Now I just have to use my influence to find out which agency has detained them.

Agent Smith

An uplifting article

I found the following article from the L.A. Times:

Pope Benedict XVI will be preaching on his visit to Washington and New York next April, his first trip to the United States as pope. That's part of a pope's job description. But many American Catholics hope that the papal visit will double as what politicians in this country call a "listening tour." They know that, erudite as this former theology professor may be, he still might be able to learn something from their experience in a pluralistic country where the Catholic faith has flourished despite -- or because of -- the separation of church and state.

Benedict's visit, announced this week, will coincide with a presidential campaign. During the 2004 campaign, America's Catholic hierarchy was divided on whether pro-choice Catholic politicians -- including Democratic presidential nominee Sen. John Kerry -- should be denied Holy Communion. Some bishops, including Cardinal Roger M. Mahony of Los Angeles, believed that pro-choice politicians should search their conscience before deciding whether to approach the Communion rail. Others took a more confrontational line, warning that they would deny the sacrament to pro-choice politicians

....

When Benedict comes to the United States, he is likely to be importuned by conservative Catholics to side with the hard-liners. He would be wiser to listen to other Catholics, laypeople as well as clergy, who know what mischief would be caused by a decree that would seem to force some Catholic officials to choose between their responsibility to their constituents or the Constitution and their standing in the church. These American Catholics believe, as President Kennedy said in 1960, in "an America where the separation of church and state is absolute; where no Catholic prelate would tell the president -- should he be Catholic -- how to act, and no Protestant minister would tell his parishioners for whom to vote."


The German guy would do well to heed this advice. We are Americans and here there is no contamination between church and State. The State will lead us all to a better day as it acquires the capabilities to take care of our needs. So the misogynistic paternalistic hierarchy should just butt out.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Stuff for sale.

Hey,

I've been cleaning out my apartment of some stuff and if anybody wants it let me know:

1 Satellite dish thing. Not sure how to hook it up.
3 Big computers
7 Little computers
1 Wireless robot eye thing with legs
1 Thing with these two wires and you plug it in and this lightening bolt arc goes between the two wires and it goes up an makes a kind of buzzing noise. It doesn't do anything else
4 Solar powered wind turbines with lithium oxide hydrogen fuel cells
1 50 pound bag of granualized crystal glucose
1 15 pound bag of used to be 50 pounds of granualized crystal glucose
4 Febreeze Spring Meadow air freshener refills (I might keep these I'm not sure)
about 250 feet of various kinds of wires and cables
1 Manual on the care of Brains in Jars
A box of 100 antiseptic non-latex gloves. I think there's about 40 or so left.

Also I just wanted people to know that I am going on a trip with my dad for a few weeks to the Carribean on his yacht. Don't think this is fun or anything because Brenda and the Erpenblechs are going too. Don't get me started on the Erpenblechs because Mrs. Erpenblech is the only person who wears more jewelery and make-up than Brenda and she has had like fifty plastic surgeries. And she wears fur clothes. I'm not kidding.

Mr. Erpenblech is from Covington Kentucky where he used to build these gigantic houses. Not as big as my dad's because they were for people who were only like doctors and dentists and lawyers and things and not people who are really rich. I mean my dad is like the Tysons and the McGees kind of rich. The Erpenblechs also have a ton of money. My dad thinks because they are supposed to be "Catholic" that I'll like them or something. But I know they're republicans.

Che'

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Wimmin Unite!!

ENOUGH about the pseudo-feminist! There's a REAL ISSUE we need to deal with here, wimmin!

It seems the phallofascist "Archbishop" Burke has issued an oppressive reaction against the properly ordained Womanpriests in "his" diocese, and has ordered them before a tribunal to answer for their courageous, inclusive, life-affirming, Gaia-inspired stand against the misogynist patriarchy.

Now, while my sisters have (quite rightly) refused to dignify this attack by appearing, it's important to support all of us who have answered the call to ordination. So all left-thinking SOV2iets must write letters condemning this act of aggression against these peaceful servants of Gaia. Inundate the "Archbishop" of St Louis with your indignation at the medieval, repressive, wimmin-hating, global-warming-disbelieving hierarchy!

We will prevail!

Elegy for H Robert Williams

Um.. Friends, Wiccans... members of Pi Kappa Gamma Alpha Beta Fraternity... (sniff)... lend me your ears.

I come to bury H. Robert Williams not to praise him! The good that people do... no wait... the evil stuff people do lives after them... but the good is oft interned with their bones. No wait... I mean... the good stuff is often pretty much the same thing that happened with the rest of them. (sniff).... So be it with H. Robert Will....... (sob)... Okay... (sniff)... I'm okay...

All right, I know a lot of people didn't like H. Robert Williams very much because he was most of the time kind of hatching evil plans and stuff. And also he was really mean and took advantage of me a lot. And also he never let anybody else win at Mega God of Death Curse of the Nemesis or anything. Also, sometimes he didn't smell too good and when I had a girl over he was always using his robot eye thing to spy on us which was just weird... But... I mean... (sob)... he was kind of like the dad I wish I had except that person is my real dad who I don't like that person very much.

I mean, that dog I picked up when I as a kid with my mom... (sob)... I mean, it was such a friendly dog and stuff and yah it didn't have much hair or anything... (sob)... but it was still a... (sob)... (sniff)... (sniff)... earthfriend... because it lived here too. Just like H. Robert (sob)... Okay...

I mean, H. Robert liked my poetry that I wrote, and he said real nice things about my mom and he told me I should go see her when I couldn't buy the souvenirs of Che' Guevara with the sunday collection... (sob)... and... (sniff)... Okay... Anyway... I mean... (sob)... okay... I'm not okay... I mean... whoever it is... even if you don't like them very much... I mean... I remember my cute english prof at U.T. She had us read all this stuff by this Dunn person. And he said No man is an Island... and (sniff) that bell that tolls... you know... that bell is tolling for thee. And by thee I mean all of you people out there. So... (sniff)... I thought Dunn was pretty stupid and everything. But maybe he was on to something.

Also there was this poem about a guy who could run really far and also there was this poem about writing a poem in a country church yard. I couldn't remember who wrote them but I bet if you go read them you'll find out.. (sniff) ... a lot of it has to do with stuff you should know. But I couldn't find them really fast...

... Okay... (Sniff) So I'd like to read this poem by e. e. cummings instead. I like e. e. cummings because he has two e's in his name and he had a lot of trouble with capitalization and grammer and spelling like me. It's called "if strangers meet"

if strangers meet
life begins-
not poor not rich
(only aware)
kind neither
nor cruel
(only complete)
i not not you
not possible;
only truthful
-truthfully,once
if strangers(who
deep our most are
selves)touch:
forever

(and so to dark)

Monday, November 12, 2007

A note from Lizzy Bole-Williams

Hey,

It's me Che' again. I got a note from H. Robert's daughter Lizzy who wanted to say something to the SOV2 community.

Dear SOV2 community,

First of all, I wanted to let you know that I am not upset with you for what happened. The fact that my father found a welcoming community in the mountains of East Tennessee says more about your character than his. If you took him in, well, you deserve what you got which is either good or bad but makes no difference to me whatever.

Second, I want to tell you that apparently to the end he held fast to that delusion of his that there was some higher power. Like the rest of you it was all in his mind and he made it into whatever he wanted it to be for him at the moment and whatever served his needs. He did feel a huge guilt over the "past crimes of the church." But the really sick thing was he took a kind of pride in all the wrong things and loved to lecture and ended every lecture with an apology which really became something of an insult since he took such apparent pleasure in it. I am guessing that you people are pretty much just like that and as Che' has made no end to saying he was sorry about what happened I feel pretty confident about that guess.

Third, my father left my mom and me with a pretty tidy sum of money. You won't get any of it so don't even bother trying. As you know my mom wanted nothing to do with this whole "brain thing" and so whatever you spent on keeping him alive that's your business not mine. You're lucky I don't sue you, but I'm not like my father.

Fourth, I don't care what you say about Gaia and all your so-called feminism. You people are full of it and you might as well give up this sham. The fact is as long as you call yourself "catholic" or "christian" you are part of the problem. Give it up and go home.

Regards,
Lizzy Bole-Williams

Anyway, you can tell that she is still probably in shock, so if everybody could maybe send her a card. I still have a lot of recycled paper and soy ink and stuff if you want to borrow it.

Che'

A note to Miss Perile and Miss Moonsword

After reviewing the surveillance from the other night, I'm afraid that I have found the cause of your friends' disappearances. Another agency is trying to muscle in on the SOV2 turf. They seem to have been detained on some made-up pretense. My superiors are angry about this because they were assured by all the other agencies that there wouldn't be any intrusion in this area. I will do everything in my power to obtain their release.

Agent Smith

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Homily, Sunday, November 11

Hey! Happy Veteran's Day! Isn't it cool how the readings are all about things that are about Veteran's Day, even though the readings were written over 7,000 years ago? It just goes to show how the Spirit moves through time. Now, I can see from some shocked faces out there that you weren't expecting me to say Happy Veteran's Day. I mean, should we be having a Day Of Silence to honor the innocent peoples killed by the bloodthirsty fascist stormtroopers that our government sends in our name to oppress the people of the world?

Yes... and no. You've got to remember that most of those bloodthirsty fascist stormtroopers are people too, or were. But they're mostly uneducated poor hillbillies and minorities, so they were easy pray for the brainwashers in the recruitment office. Underneath all that testosterone machismo, they are like little flowers that grope toward the sun. Love them, be church to them. Our war is with their puppetmasters.

Now, I also want to touch on my recent trip to Hugo Chavez' Workers Paradise. Did you know they have an army too? So when you honor veterans today, you're not only honoring the fascist veterans of Amerika, but also you're honoring the heroic freedom fighters of Venezuela, Cuba, Zimbabwe, Iran, Nicaragua, and all those places where free peoples have said NO to the abrogation of their right to choose.

Which brings me to the unfortunate events at Ché's apartment. Some of you have criticized Peevee Rajendajendan for eating H Robert's brain, mostly because he was not being a vegetarian. But let me say this - the invisible hand of cultural relativism demands that we only criticize our own culture. Since Peevee comes from India, whatever he does is OK, since it is within his own ethos. Moreover, those Indians don't know any better. It's not like they are civilized, or something. But when it comes to their relationship with the spirit, they are so far ahead of us. We've got a lot to learn from them. Sure, they burn womyn alive, but what you have to realize is that being burned alive is a valid life choice for womyn who live in that ethos.

Finally, I salute Bishop Crispian Hollis, who took a courageous stand for womyn's rights. Kudos, Crispi! You've inspired us here at SOV2 to stand up for the legalization of prostitution, which is another way that womyn can break the chains of male oppression. Let's all be like the little brown bear, who looks for honey though he does not make it, or like the swallow, who sings her own church into being every morning!

Finally, I have some exciting news! As you know, our misallette and our bulletins are produced by Oregon Catholic Press, and also we run our liturgy in accordance with their Liturgical Planning Toolkit. They have an exciting new program in which they will also administer our faith community completely. They write the homilies, provide faith formation classes, and send one of their own trained music ministers to lead the singing. And the best part is, we get a 20% discount off of the misalettes and other OCP publications if we turn over the faith community to their capable guidance.

I'll be deciding whether to go this route over the next couple of weeks - let me know what you think!

Happy Veterans Day!

Keith Released

Since H. Robert's plans have been terminated, I have decided to release Keith. There will be no charges brought against Peevee, because, as far as the government is concerned, H. Robert actually died a while ago.

To Miss Perile: I m not sure what has happened with your friends, but I will look back through the surveillance footage to see what I can find.

Agent Smith

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Good News & Bad News

Hey! Well I am really psyched to be back here at SOV2. The good news is that Hugo signed off on my departure from Venezuela, although I have promised to take a sabbatical there next year. I'm also really happy that the Gorebertine community is here. Welcome to Church!

But on my return, I'm afraid I have some bad news. My good friend Peevee Rajendajendan will not be the guest homilist tomorrow. I suppose this is sort of a mia culper. you see, I've just come from Ché's Apartment, and it seems that Peevee accidentally ate H Robert's brain. Somebody put H Robert's jar on the kitchen shelf, and Peevee naturally mistook it for pickled monkey brain, which, as he comes from a culture with its own particular ethos, is perfectly OK. Except that it wasn't a monkey brain at all, but H Roberts.

It may please some of you to know that Peevee said it was the most delicious brain he had ever eaten.

Needless to say, he feels just awful about it, so please be extra nice to him if you see him around tomorrow.

Bye for now! I'm off to see how things are going at the rectory.

Peace Out!

WWWOOWOOOOWOWOWOOO!

THAT WAS AWESOME! You guys have to come over since the VOLS beat the HOGS! WE ARE PARTYING! In your face H. Robert you LOSER! I bet your ust sitting around playing PS3 with Keith again.

Che'

Uncooperative

I don't know if it is because we refused to give him his five triple quarter pounders last night or if he is just in a state of shock, but Keith has stubbornly refused to talk. I'm technically not allowed to torture anyone to extract information, but I have instructed the 'inquisitors' (a great word I got from the SSLI) to feed him only healthy food until he tells us what we want to know. There will be a bag of McDonalds in the room, but he will be given only salads and traditionally healthy entrees.

Friday, November 9, 2007

Questions

Due to recent events here, I have decided to take Keith in for questioning. He is now sitting in a room in my new headquarters. We are most interested in finding out what that brain-in-a-jar has been planning and scheming about, since I know that his plan runs much deeper than the control of the SOV2 Community.

Agent Smith

Che' the Apostate

See the danger of an apostate? Look at all that has happened. Che' has become one of those frat boy jock hangeroners that we purged at Villanoce. The types who will be first against the wall when the revolution comes. Everyone is so distressed all because of this. Che's emanation of misogynistic chauvinistic waves has driven away most of the Gyno-americanos from SOV2. And look at what that has done to Sr. Fairah. And I'm sure it's also the reason behind the way H. Robert has been acting lately. H. has always been so steady and sure and reasonable. Now this. And don't even get me started on the absolute anguish it's caused Dr. Argot. Why I can't even get him to concentrate on the wonderful Chapel of the Americas that we were planning with the mural of Commandante Castro behind the main altar and side altars to Che Guevara and Hugo Chavez. I can't wait for Dym Tim to arrive and put him to lefts. I'd almost say we should turn to the methods of the Society of St. Leo I to deal with him. My wah is seriously disturbed.

You are all banned forever!

This is my first command as Supreme Facilitator to you the people of SOV2 faith community.

I am only here to help you, not to boss you around or dictate to you policies. That is why your continued driveling and whining is really just getting in the way of fruitful dialog. I am sick to death over this. You people refuse to be helped which is why henceforwards I am the only one who is allowed to speak. You all must remain completely silent and still before me.

From my perch here on the kitchen counter between the pickled olives and the spice rack which includes fennel, tumeric, corriander, and cumin , I shall administer my facilitations with utmost compassion and equality regardless of where you are in your personal faith journeys. If you but meditate upon my words, you shall come to look upon me as a kind and loving disembodied sky spirit, a star which hovers above you and upon which you shall gaze eternally in wonder and delight and gratitude. In a way, you and I shall be one in that I incorporates in myself all the supreme goods of nurturing community and ...

... just a minute... Someone is knocking at the door... Keith! See who it is...

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Coming Home

Hey!

Well, I've received a preliminary visa to leave Venezuela, although I haven't gotten permission from Hugo yet. Anyway, with things in chaos up there at SOV2, I called a good friend of mine, P.V. Rajendajendan, and he has agreed to come and give the homily at SOV2 this Sunday.

Peevee (as we call him) is an expert in transcendental guruism, and is particularly adept at forging reconciled amicability. Please make him welcome. As I understand that the Rectory is something of a mess, I gave him directions to Ché's apartment (also I don't want him staying at the Rectory because he cooks really smelly food and it really stinks the place up when he's around, but I thimk Keith won't mind)

See you all soon!

Peace out!

Leadership Committee

Syblyng H. Robert, I think that's a wonderful idea! Obviously I was mistaken to be worried about you. I think we both understand that with Syblyng Fairah's departure, this faith community lost its fymynyn center (I'm so sorry I never got to meet this syblyng).

But don't worry! I'm willing to make the sacrifice demanded to bring us all back to Gaia. I must say, I'm amazed at your accurate description of me. How did you know about my doctorate in Advanced Late 20th Century Lyric Rhyme, with an Emphasis on the prose of Joan Baez?? And my treatise Womyn in Film: An Exploration of how Barbara Stanwyck, Jane Fonda, and Adrienne Barbeau Helped Usher In the Aquarian Age, while well received, is sadly no longer in print! I'm very impressed.

I'm somewhat confused by "this person should be deprived of a body", as obviously I am corporeal....But anyway! I only regret that I will be away in St. Louis this Sunday....I will be participating in an amazing pan-Gaian confirmation of the Eternal Fymynyn, but when I return I will be entirely ready to lead the Spirit of Vatican 2 Faith Community into its future as a community of Gaia!

Good bye and God bless...

First, about the road trip: at first I was going just to accompany Molly Jean. But as we visited, read and prayed, I started to sense a stirring in my own heart.

I’m seeing a whole new side of the Church. The evil male hierarchy isn’t evil at all. They’re not even anti-womyn. DO NOT STOP READING.... You see, as we traveled, we took turns reading MULIERIS DIGNITATEM out loud. That is an apostolic letter by John Paul II. Now before everyone starts screaming at me, let me tell you: it’s IN YOUR FACE on the dignity of womyn. While I’ve always been proud of being a womyn, I had NO idea before how BLESSED by God I am as a womyn. And how much men and womyn need each other. Even as a woman promised to celibacy, men still compliment me. Here’s my favorite (well, maybe second favorite) line: “In the life of consecrated women, for example, who live according to the charism and the rules of the various apostolic Institutes, it can express itself as concern for people, especially the most needy: the sick, the handicapped, the abandoned, orphans, the elderly, children, young people, the imprisoned and, in general, people on the edges of society. In this way a consecrated woman finds her Spouse, different and the same in each and every person, according to his very words: "As you did it to one of the least of these my brethren, you did it to me" (Mt 25:40).” Whoever thinks this is anti-womyn obviously can’t read. And my FAVORITE line: “the dignity of women is measured by the order of love, which is essentially the order of justice and charity.”

Whoever thinks the man writing this is fascist and chauvinistic and anti-womyn … well, I challenge you to read it for yourself.

And as we visited these awesome communities, I began to see a part of my life that I’m really missing. I need to be with other Sisters. I need to relearn what my vows are about, and I can’t do that unless I’m around other Sisters.

We stopped at the provincial house for my community in Omaha. Sadly, I had no desire to stay there for more than a short visit. But when we stayed at the other convents, I felt so drawn to stay and not leave. I felt especially attracted to the nuns (and they are nuns) at Institute of Servants of the Queen of Apostles in Columbus, OH. They have a beautiful spirit, and well, I want to learn more about them. So they’ve invited me to stay. There is nothing in Knoxville for me to return there. Everything was ruined in the water-leak… absolutely everything. I have all my worldly possessions with me.

I’ve updated my profile one last time. I will be able to check the community blog once or twice during the next week, but starting on the 17th, I’m leaving SOV2 for good. The nuns don’t do anything online, and have asked me to let go of it, too. I’m sad I can’t come back to say goodbye to everyone, but I want to stay here.

A CALL TO ARMS, WOMYN: We need more of you to step up to leadership roles at SOV2. “H. Roberts” (or whomever is playing him) claims to have a committee taking applications to leadership here. I suspect it’s a committee of one. In any case, he needs to be BOMBARDED with womyn applying. ARM YOURSELF with strength, the order of justice and love and come forth to leadership at SOV2!

My final testaments:

Che’: BE NICE. Let go of your anger. Be church to everyone, even the Syb family.

IR: I’ll miss you! You have MUCH to give to SOV2 … don’t let anyone make you believe otherwise. I promise you’ll find a friend to take my place.

H. Roberts: you’re fake, a farce, a sham. A brain in a jar can’t communicate like you claim to. Who ever is claiming to be H. Roberts, be honest with the community. It’s wrong if you aren’t. Che' and Keith: don't change his water / mixture any more. The dead brain needs to rot.

Maryann: take over as spiritual advisor for me. Maybe you can get Brittnee to come back????? The community needs more womyn!

Dym Tim: If you’re ever in Columbus, come see me. Come back soon!

God bless you all. I love you and will pray for you.

Yo Dudes!

Yo!

I've got to say that hanging out with Enrico the last few days has been awesome! We have had a great time and all these really cute girls are really, really cool. We all got wasted last night and played volleyball on the sand volleyball court last night by Father Tim's pool. It was like 40 degrees but it was an ABSOLUTE blast. I woke up at noon.

I can't believe this because when I was at U.T. these were the guys that I thought were absolute jerks but you know what! They are really pretty cool. I invited some of them over to my dad's and we all hung out and one of them's dad knows my dad and they went to college together and stuff and both go to the same country club. I can't remember his name though because I was like completely wasted. But I think he's in Pi Kappa Gamma Alpha Beta or something. I can't remember. If I had stayed at U.T. and I had rushed them he said I would definitely have gotten in.

Anyway, we're going to start with screw drivers and bloody mary's around 11 Saturday. Then I'm going to try and sneak in to the game on a student ticket. I have to say that you people are completely wonked if you don't hang with us this weekend!

Oh yah, they gave me a new nickname, so if you want to talk to me from now on you better call me by it. We're going to get wasted tonight and go water skiing in the dark with my Dad's speedboat.

Cool Che'

Listo Malpermesitaro

Thanks to ever alert syblyngs we now add the following sites to the Listo Malpermesitaro. Be vigilant, we WILL root out radtradism on the internetweb:


Institute of Christ the King: C,EM,F,POD,RT
Laudem Gloriae
: C,CF,F,IT,O


And as an additional warning... beware of the motionpicturefilm Bella. I have heard from others who have had the misfortune to see this that it is deeply upsetting to the correctly centered syblyng. Amongst many offenses the main character is a chef and graphic scenes are shown of vegetables syblyngs being maimed and burned. If we ever find the time we may need to begin a Filmo Malpermesitaro for motionpicturefilms and a Libro Malpermesitaro for printed materials. So little time, so much radtradyism.

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Batali fajron per fajro

Tonight was very sad. I saw a bumpersticker on a Saturn Vue that read "I love my German shepherd, Pope Benedict XVI". As if we were all some type of mindless sheep in need of a shepherd. It was another forceful reminder of the rampant forces of patriarchal Reagan-Ratzingerism that are rampant today. Once again I say we must fight fire with fire, or "batali fajron per farjo" in that wonderful language Esperanto. If the radtrad legions want a language besides the vernacular, then let them use that wonderful language. I'm of half a mind to invite Dr. Alesdorf here to conduct an intensive course in Esperanto complete with recitations of the works of Hans Kung in Esperanto.

Also I've noticed that there are so many places on this internetweb that just reek of this neoradtradyism. Dym Tim has done a commendable service in pointing some of these sites out and banning them to save the spirits of the syblyngs. With the help of one of the syblyngs with the Druidical Liberation Army I have created a internetwebpage that lists all of these sites at the Listo Malpermesitaro. In addition I have added the two following sites:

St. John Cantius: AM,BS,C+,EM,F,O,PH,POD,RT
What Does The Prayer Really Say: F,C,EM,RT

Remember: Only You Can Prevent Radtradism

Leadership Committee

Dear Friends,


Well. It is with a heavy heart that I must say Che has just gone rather unstable. The wonderful commenter Ima Perile was quite right to point out certain deficiencies in Che's character. For example, his tendency towards violent confrontations. His dependency on patriarchal inheritance laws, his attachment to "un-earth-friendly" foods, and his dislike of male liturgical dancing among them.


Interestingly enough, Che was not so against liturgical dancing when it came to his "Liturgy of Purple Rain" for which he choreographed a dance with Britnee Hamilton to the tune of Raspberry Beret.

Nevertheless, we must continue to move forward. The absence of Father Tim is a necessity for us to endure, something of a challenge, a difficulty, a setback. But looked on in a different way, perhaps it is something to build on. Is it not true that Father Tim represents only one part of our common human heritage? Is not the criticism of Ima correct in saying that, even if he does not intend, his maleness in a position of authority represents an affront to womyn who have been forced to endure thousands of years of repression by patriarchal societies?

I am afraid it is too true.

But this crisis between the "baked foods" and the "raw foods" factions must be healed. To do so, we are in need of a strong and effectual leader.

Therefore, I believe that it is time that a new leader be appointed by the community. One who can unite the community into one based on love, tolerance, acceptance, inclusion, diversity, peace and justice! Whoever this person is, I believe this person should have certain qualifications:

Intelligence - as marked by an advanced degree
Communication Skills - for example has authored several books and articles
Spirituality - Should be well attuned to the divine feminine
Leadership Qualities - Should be able to lead a team in drafting important documents such as the recent Mandate on Raw and Cooked Foods.
and most importantly
Empathy to the Disenfranchised - preferably this person should be deprived of a body.

I am taking it upon myself to appoint a committee to interview candidates. Rather than cause controversy, this committee will be completely anonymous and go about its work in strict and total secrecy. If you are selected to this committee I will inform you and swear you in to total silence. If you are not selected, trust that your feelings and opinions will be adequately considered regardless.

Until then, Shine On People! Shine On!

H. Roberts

Is something wrong?

I'm worried about our syblyngs Keith & H. Robert. I brought the green tea to them as requested, but the apartment door was locked & no one answered when I knocked. So I went around & looked in the open window. There was this strange light in syblyng H. Robert's jar; syblyng Keith was staring into it as if hy was doing trance meditation.

At first I couldn't hear what they were saying; then I heard this voice in my head! I couldn't make out everything it was saying, but it kept repeating "sure sure sure". Then syblyng Keith began nodding and saying things like "of course" and "yeah, that'll get him"....and then HY started repeating "sure sure sure"!!

And hy had this green goo all over hym....I don't know what it was, but it was pulsing.

Sybling Che, I think you should stay in the rectory.

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Contest winner

So, the winner is: CHRISTINE: WELL DONE! 100%

1. Philadelphia, PA - Convent of Divine Love - Pink Sisters
2. Starrucca, PA - Oblates of Mary, Queen of Apostles - Traditional Order for Women
3. Summit, NJ - MONASTERY OF OUR LADY OF THE ROSARY - Dominican Nuns
4. Columbus OH - Institute of Servants of the Queen of Apostles - Traditional Order for Women
5. Rockford, IL - Poor Clares Corpus Christi Monastery
6. Debuque, IA - Our Lady of the Mississippi Abbey - Trappist nuns
7. Agnew, NE - The Carmel of Jesus, Mary and Joseph (Discalced Carmelites ) - Traditional Order for Women
8. Denton, NE - Our Lady of Guadalupe Seminary (FSSP w/ Latin Mass)

All the cities have either a Cloistered Convent or a Latin-based (Trinitine) Convent. Except Denton, NE. It’s the American headquarters for the FSSP. They don’t have a women’s community YET, but are beginning one. Molly Jean wanted to go there. But she’d have to go to Europe for formation if she joined them, and that’s not “on her radar screen.”

The prize? We prayed for you at every chapel, every morning and evening prayer, and had a mass said for you. Congratulations, Christine!

I’ll write more tomorrow.

Settle Down

Wow! Things are getting pretty intense here! I go to Nashville for the day to report to my superiors and I come back to find blackened carrots lying around and sticky globs of uncooked food stuck to all of the buildings and trees.

Che, I am coming up to the rectory with organic (cooked) pizza and some organic beers, so that we can talk about what's going on. Please open the door and let me come in.

IR: I talked to the game warden and asked her to let you go if you promised not to hunt that many deer at a time again, but she seems to think that I over-stepped my jurisdiction by asking for your release. I did get her to let you get out by Thursday, though.

L: I appreciate that paperwork that you e-mailed me this morning--my superiors weren't happy with the "guestimations" for the Syblings' birthdates.

I am also very unhappy with the FBI trying to muscle into my turf with their new facilities and high tech gadgetry. Agent Lambert, who is in charge of this project, has disliked me since I beat him in the inter-agency chili cookoff last year--this relocation is his way at getting back at me:
http://www.knoxnews.com/news/2007/nov/06/fbi-sets-sights-on-new-building/


Agent Smith

In Gaia's Name, Peace!

Syblyng Che, Syblyng Joe didn't mean any harm throwing those rock syblyngs. Hy just wasn't hymsylf at the time; hy has problems like that occasionally. Hy was very close to a syblyng called Timothy Leary during the Golden Era, and it affects hym negatively sometimes. Hy thought they wanted a closer look at the rectory kitchen.

As for the wet foods....well, I can certainly find some drier recipes for you, if that would help. I know you don't really mean all those terribly hurtful things you said! I know you really realize that all syblyngs are indigenous and therefore victims of the Establishment!!

I beg you, please, please don't commit any acts of inter-syblyng violence you'll regret later! Have mercy on your carrot syblyngs!!!!!

The current unpleasantness...

Che I am very disappointed in you. First you miss my homily this Sunday. I cannot express to everyone what a wonderful and joyous experience that was for everyone. Instead of the normal noise pollution during this time of reparations we had a 45 minute silent reflection and meditation upon all of our sins committed by ourselves and our ancestors upon Gaea, womyn, animals, the environment, indigenous peoples, Wiccans, Witches, Reformed Witches, Non Denominational Practitioners of the Art, trees, plants and other various holy spirits of the universe. And then I go off to commune with Gaea to make reparations on behalf of all of us and this happens.

H. Robert warned me that you might be a secret part of the Reagan-Ratzingerist Cabal. And now you threaten armed insurrection against Gaea Herself. If only you could center yourself. (Some of Keith's green leaf tea might help.) We could discuss your fire addiction. Perhaps there are some sort of offsets you could perform while you struggle with this addiction. And I'll need to speak with Dym Tim as your vicious verbal assault against all GynoAmericans just cannot go unnoticed. I do believe you need a long and strenuous sensitivity training session. But first you must surrender yourself to the tender arms of Gaea and beg forgiveness. Then the healing can start.

And I'm sorry, but I.R. will have to remain in custody of the fascists. The collection this week went to buying carbon offsets for the needy.

Hugo Chavez Brigade has been mobilized.

OKAY NOW I AM REALLY MAD!

I am mobilizing the Hugo Chavez Brigade and we are going to take our protest to SOV2 itself which means that I am going to kick you wet foods people that are throwing rocks and sticks out of there because its obvious that you are disrespecting my diversity.

Not only that I am sick of all this feminism stuff. YES YOU HEARD ME! I mean all we ever do is protest a bunch of stuff and every time I say some girl looks cute people are saying that I am a chauvinist and stuff. I mean I like Gaia as much as the next person but I think Gaia is like Julia Roberts and wants to stay home and bake cookies for us revolutionaries who have to go out and actually fight repression and things. And YOU HEARD ME! I SAID BAKE COOKIES! WOMYN SHOULD BAKE STUFF A LOT! Because I think that's what womyn are best at. I mean go to a traditional culture some time and you will see taht WOMYN SEW THINGS AND COOK THINGS! I mean EVEN DOROTHY DAY HAD A PAIR OF NITTING NEEDLES!

And WOMYN SHOULD TRY TO LOOK PRETTY! They should go to the gym a lot and work out and eat vegetarian stuff WHICH I AM TOTALLY FOR! Do you think the PETA girls would be as AWESOME as they are if they didn't shave their legs and wear make-up. I don't mean a lot of make-up and jewelry and stuff but like the right amount of make-up like lip gloss or whatever.

I mean the way a lot of people around here talk about feminism its like they want us to just talk about womyn all the time. THAT IS STUPID! Feminism is just a way of people to ignore the plight of endigeneos peoples.

And I am NOT GETTING KEITH ANY MORE BURGER KING FOOD EVER! I AM SICK OF TAKING CARE OF ALL THESE PEOPLE IN MY APARTMENT!

If I want to eat food that is cooked I have a right! Its called progress! Look it up in a thesaurus some time. I mean you wet-food people are acting like cathlofascists and stuff because your all being legalistic in your religion and I am sick of it.

AND KEITH YOU LOOKED STUPID DOING THAT STUPID LITURGICAL DANCE THING! You deserved to be hurt because it was so STUPID!

CHE' (REALLY MAD)

Monday, November 5, 2007

Factions are wrong!

Dear Friends,

I must say how shameful this has become and how childish you are all appearing. This has become most discouraging. The fact that the sheriff had to come by and break up the mob scene outside the rectory really shows the level to which this confrontation has escalated, or should I say become traditionalized.

Isn’t this precisely what the regressive element would wish to see happen at SOV2? A split into factions? What would Father Tim think if he could see you all squabbling away about which is more ecologically friendly and more respectful of the organic life-spirit?

The fact is we must recognize that not everyone has been fully incorporated into the spirit. There are gradations in all things. Each of us is on her or his own particular journey towards the oneness that is the life-spirit and divine feminine regardless of what you call it. Aren’t we all - excepting me of course – just getting a little too riled up over semantics. This reminds me of these battles we had at Villanoce College over whether biologically male transgendered females can or can not use the ladies room and participate in women’s dignity month festivities.

May I remind you that this community is about acceptance. And as repugnant as it is to some of us, the Bakers are still members of the community albeit not as spiritually advanced as the rest of us. If they are using the kitchen in the rectory to cook the cheese on their tofu pizzas, that is no reason to start throwing bricks and rocks through the windows!

But to you the bakers, I would urge you people who still employ the flame to just ease up a little and submit to the fact that the Gorebertine syblyngs have attained a little more enlightenment on this issue than you have. You have become lax in your stewardship. If you must cook please have the decency to do so in the privacy of your own homes and do not use SOV2 property.

H. Robert Williams

Sunday, November 4, 2007

Hey! Where I was!

Hey everybody!

I'm not sure who did the homily thing this weekend but it wasn't me. Apparently Keith ruptured something during the liturgical dance you know the part where he was writhing around on the floor right after the Arabesk and we thought he was break dancing or something or he was empathizing with the Earth or whatever. (I thought actually he was channeling one of those animals that gets shot.) Well apparently that was actual pain.

Anyway, I guess nobody checked on him after the mass of reparations until Saturday night when we have the pizza social. Except this time we had to use unbaked pizzas which aren't very good. So I found him lying on the floor trying to shuffle his feet but he had kind of got himself in a corner. So anyway, we took him to the hospital and he has some sort of slipped disk. But he is back at the apartment lying in his bed. I didn't know if you knew this but that green tea he grows in his moms basements is actually really good at relieving pain and stuff and so I got him a couple of those ziplock baggies of it and he has been in his room talking to H. Robert. H. Robert likes you to put a couple leaves in his water jar sometimes.

Anyway I. R. needs someone to bail him out of jail which is something our Social Justice group is supposed to do but basically i don't have any money left and I was hoping whoever took up the money this week could go and use whatever to get him out.

Thanks!

Che'

Saturday, November 3, 2007

Identification?

Oh, syblyng Smith, surely you realize that Gaia is everything and everything is Gaia, so that there aren't really any such things as borders; therefore, no one can be an "immigrant", legal or otherwise. And as the Gorebertine Community is committed to St. Albert's holy injunction to reduce our carbon footprint, we do not own or operate petrodeath machines, so of course we don't have "licenses".

Oh and a friendly word of caution about the "social security number" you got from Syblyng Joe: he used to be in a band, and sometimes he will repeat old song lyrics at random. In order to save you some work, and by way of apology for our syblyng the squirrel's little accident on your blackberry (I didn't know squirrels could vomit, did you?), I'll tell you that at the particular moment you asked him for his "social security number", he was repeating lines from a song from the benighted 1980s---I believe it's called "Jenny". Syblyng Bob says it's by a syblyng named Tommy Tutone.

I will pray for you, that you come to realize that things like "government" and "paperwork" are simply ways that we syblyngs close ourselves off from the beauty and simplicity of Gaia's creation for us all....

Paperwork Nightmare!

My superiors asked me to do some follow-up and create files for all of the new members of the SOV2 Community. I guess they didn't realize how much trouble that would turn out to be. None of the "Syblings" have any licenses or any kind of identification. Only one of them actually even has a birth certificate or social security number. Even the Amish have more paperwork than that! I don't know how they were brought up in today's society without any kind of identification. As far as the government is concerned, the Sybs are all illegal immigrants. I spent hours creating papers based on "guestimations" of when they were born.

Not only that, but when they came to my office, they had barnyard animals, feral cats and dogs, and even a rabid squirrel in tow. They left a huge mess all over my brand new office, and got rid of that new office smell. I have to look up maid services now in Knoxville, but the first one I called came out to look and fled immediately.

Agent Smith

Raw Foods Seminar

As part of syblyng Che's wonderful Get to Know Your Earth Friends program, I will be hosting a seminar on how to respect our plant syblyngs (and show sympathy & solidarity with our syblyngs who were burned at the stake, which is so important as I think the Reparations liturgy showed) by accepting their gifts of nutrition as close to the original form as possible. Raw foods are also an important part of reducing your carbon footprint. There will be a workshop on how to prepare non-burned meals, and I'm working on arranging a lecture by a celebrity raw foods enthusiast---syblyng Woody Harrelson! Che, did you ever meet him? Can you help with that? Everyone keep checking back, as there will be more news to come!

Friday, November 2, 2007

Get to know your earth-friends month

Hey everybody!

This is a reminder that it's know your earthfriends month at SOV2. That means that its really time to get back to nature and learn how the rest of the animal kingdom copes with all the environmental damage we are doing. A lot of things are happening again so stay in touch with this web-site to keep up to date.

We are going to learn about how other animals stay warm without using fossil fuels. So we are going to practice natural bioinsulation. Basically we will be learning how to make clothing out of organic vegetable matter. It's cool because you don't even need to know how to sew or anything which a lot of you don't. Also how to make shelters and stuff.

We are also going to be learning first-aid care for animals that might be wounded. Maybe they were hit by an SUV or by a hunter or had there habitat destroyed by a dam or a nuclear plant.

The big thing is the march for Turkeys which is going to be on November 21st this year. Do you know how many Turkeys are killed each November? It's a lot. Also a lot of people get really fat at Thanksgiving because they eat weigh too much food and stuffing. Anyway, we are going to have a group from ALF come in and tell us what we can do to help stop this injustice.

Che'

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Resolution

So I talked to Dr. al-Fakkir, and apparently the whole thing was just a joke--part of the festivities. Agent Peters has been returned, and we all shared a few laughs over coffee (the doctor doesn't drink beer for some reason--he said it had something to do with religion).

Agent Smith